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Men Who Are Attracted to Penises (Including Attraction to No-Op / Pre-Op Trans Women)

Attraction is messy, layered, and often more specific than people admit out loud. Some men are strongly drawn to penises as a feature—sometimes in addition to being drawn to femininity, sometimes independent of it. This can include straight-identified men who find no-op or pre-op trans women especially attractive: women who present fully feminine while also having a functional penis.

This topic gets misunderstood fast because people mix up orientation, identity, body preferences, and social stigma. A better way to approach it is with clear terms, respect for trans women as women, and an emphasis on consent and dignity.

1) Attraction vs. Identity: Why “Straight Men” Can Still Be Into This

A lot of straight men experience attraction that’s primarily anchored in femininity—face, voice, hair, curves, style, softness, energy, mannerisms—more than in a specific set of genitals. For them, a trans woman can register as “exactly my type” because she’s a woman, full stop.

So why does the penis factor feel extra compelling for some?

It adds novelty or intensity without changing the core attraction to femininity.

It can feel like “the best of both worlds” to someone whose desires include both feminine aesthetics and the erotic charge of a penis.

It can feel emotionally freeing—a private attraction that someone has had for years but never said out loud.

It can be a specific “type” the way some people have a type for tall partners, muscular partners, or certain styles.

Important nuance: a man can be straight-identified and still have a genital preference that doesn’t match stereotypes. Identity labels are social tools; desire doesn’t always follow neat boxes.

2) What People Mean by “Penis Fetish” (And When That Label Helps or Hurts)

The word “fetish” gets used in two different ways:

Casual shorthand: “I’m really into penises” or “that feature is a big turn-on for me.”

Clinical fetish: arousal depends heavily on a specific object/body part to the point it’s central.

Most of what people call a “penis fetish” is actually just a strong preference or a high-salience turn-on.

Where it can become harmful is when attraction turns into:

Objectification (“I don’t care about you as a person, I only want the body part”)

Dehumanization (reducing trans women to anatomy)

Entitlement (expecting access, secrecy, or compliance)

A healthier frame is: “This is something I’m attracted to, but I still treat people like whole people.”

3) Why Some Straight Men Find Feminine + Penis Especially Attractive

There are a few common psychological patterns that show up (often overlapping):

A) Contrast and “Gendered Charge”

Some people are turned on by contrast: very feminine presentation paired with a body trait society codes as “male.” That contrast can create a heightened erotic “spark” in the brain.

B) Expanded Erotic Menu

Many men have more variety in desire than they publicly admit. A feminine partner with a penis can feel like a way to explore that variety while still being with a woman.

C) Power, Roles, and Fantasy (Without the Stereotypes)

For some, it’s not about “who is the man/woman,” but about the flexibility of roles and the excitement of a partner who doesn’t fit conventional scripts. That can feel thrilling and intimate.

D) Taboo and Secrecy (Stigma-Driven, Not “Natural”)

Sometimes the intensity comes from taboo. When something is stigmatized, it can become more charged. This is common across many “forbidden” attractions—what matters is not letting taboo turn into shame-driven behavior toward partners.

4) Common Misconceptions That Cause Real Harm
Misconception: “If a straight man likes a trans woman with a penis, he’s not straight.”

Not necessarily. Attraction patterns and identity labels don’t always align perfectly. Also, trans women are women.

Misconception: “Trans women exist to fulfill this fantasy.”

Absolutely not. Trans women are not a category built for anyone’s consumption. They’re people with boundaries, preferences, and varied relationships to their own bodies.

Misconception: “All trans women want to use their penis sexually.”

No. Some do, some don’t, some are dysphoric about it, some are indifferent, and preferences can change over time. Never assume.

Misconception: “Talking about attraction means it’s okay to be explicit or invasive.”

Being attracted to someone doesn’t entitle anyone to sexual questions, explicit comments, or requests—especially early on.

5) Respectful Language and Mindset

If you’re talking about this topic (dating, writing, community discussion), these are generally safer approaches:

Say “trans women” rather than reducing language.

Use “no-op” (no surgery) and “pre-op” (may plan surgery) carefully—people may not identify with those labels.

Avoid treating “functional penis” as a guarantee. Bodies vary, comfort varies, and sexual dynamics vary.

Think person-first: attraction is valid; objectification is not.

A good internal check:

“If this person didn’t have that body trait, would I still see them as fully human, fully worthy of respect, and still potentially lovable?”

6) Dating Reality: How to Be a Safe, Desirable Partner (Not a Walking Red Flag)

Straight men who are genuinely into no-op/pre-op trans women often run into two problems:

Fear of stigma (being seen as “less straight,” judged by friends, etc.)

Accidentally making the woman feel fetishized (even when intentions are good)

Practical guidelines:

Do:

Lead with normal interest: personality, style, humor, vibe.

Ask about boundaries the way you would with anyone: “What do you enjoy / not enjoy?”

Be clear and calm about attraction: “I’m attracted to you, and I respect you.”

Treat privacy like a shared decision, not a demand.

Don’t:

Make the first messages about anatomy.

Push for secrecy (“no one can know”) as a condition of dating.

Assume sexual roles or acts based on her body.

Talk like she’s a “fantasy category” instead of a woman you’re into.

The quickest way to signal maturity is to show you can hold two truths:

“I’m very attracted to this.”

“I’m not entitled to any part of you.”

7) The Difference Between Healthy Attraction and Fetishization

Here’s a clean contrast:

Healthy attraction looks like:

You’re attracted to her femininity and also enjoy her body.

You care about consent, comfort, and emotional safety.

You can talk about sex without making it the only topic.

You’re not ashamed of her—or yourself.

Fetishization looks like:

You focus obsessively on one body feature.

You ignore her feelings about her own anatomy.

You want her only in secret, or only for sex.

You treat her like a prop in a fantasy.

If someone realizes they’ve been fetishizing, the fix is not “stop being attracted,” it’s grow up emotionally: learn to relate to a whole person, not a feature.

8) A Note on Ethics and Community Impact

Because trans women face disproportionate harassment and objectification, it matters how this attraction is expressed in the world. Respectful attraction can be affirming and loving. But careless “fetish talk” contributes to a culture where trans women feel unsafe, reduced, and scrutinized.

If you’re writing about this publicly, it helps to:

Emphasize consent and personhood

Avoid language that frames trans women as “best of both worlds” trophies

Include the reality that many trans women have complicated feelings about their genitals